I was at a company dinner last night and came home at 8:30. True to form, Juliana ran to me and immediately kidnapped me upstairs to have me to herself. We were playing our little “put the baby to bed” game where we take turns being Mommy and tucking each other in for a story. It’s our little thing but this time Juliana stopped looked at me and said, “I love you Mommy. I’m glad you are back to me.” It took all I could not to burst into tears.
Love. Love for this little person that adores me for the sheer fact that I am her mom. Guilt. Guilt for being at the work dinner. For the work travel I had last week. For a job with overnights.
I was always told being a mom is the hardest job in the world but it’s not difficult like anything I’ve done before. It’s rewarding and beautiful, messy and exhausting- and a long time before the verdict’s in and you know if you accomplished your goal. It’s my job to shape and guide this little person, to help her find her place in society as a successful adult. When I sit back and think about the magnitude of this responsibility it’s completely terrifying to me.
Lately I’ve been thinking about the person I want Juliana to become and realized there are five qualities I want to develop in her. With Mother’s Day around the corner I thought it would be fun to share this little list with you and if you are a mom reading this I would love to hear if you’ve done something similar too.
Kind. In an age where trust is lacking and we as a society are self-centered, I want Juliana to grow up treating everyone she encounters as she would want to be treated. I want her to give others the benefit of the doubt and to think about how she can improve the lives of others around her.
Confident. Many of us were challenged with this as teenage girls. In a culture that sends mixed signals to girls on who they should be and what their worth should be based on, I want Juliana to grow up grounded in herself and confident in her abilities. For me, true confidence didn’t come until I stopped trying to be anything but the best version of myself but that was years in the making. I want to raise Juliana believing from the start she is enough and she doesn’t need anyone or anything to see her full value and be confident in it.
Passionate. I want Juliana to find her passion and chase it with everything she got, whether that’s a ballet dancer or a trauma surgeon. I want to help her find what makes her tick and show her how to chase her dreams to turn them into a reality.
Tenacious. There’s no such thing as overnight success. Everything I have achieved in life- whether my career, fitness, financial this blog- have all been the result of hard work over time. I want Juliana to not only find her passion but to put in the effort it takes and not give up when things get tough.
Honest. In a world with a lot of grey lines where it can be tempting to cheat if you think no one will see, I want Juliana to internalize honesty as an everyday way of life no matter the temptation she faces.
This post wouldn’t be complete without a tribute to my beautiful mama because I don’t know how she did it with FOUR of us. Thank you Mom, for everything you did for me (now I know!) and for shaping me into the adult I am today. I love you and want to make you proud now that it’s my turn with Juliana.
XO,
Terra
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Omg this is absolutely precious. Totally made me tear up. She’s so lucky to have you as her mom.
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Thank you so much Courtney, that means more than you’ll ever know. <3